You can say anything foolish to a dog, and that dog will still give you a look that says, "WOW!! What a great idea!! I never would have thought of that!!"
Some people are born on third base, then spend the rest of their lives thinking they hit a triple.
That first video is the only one I could get through. But what the hell? that is harassment and assault, theft. I'm surprised it didn't result in violence. If it were me I would have bled that fish out after the first comment.